Aidan

Gluten Sensitivity — At the beginning of your upkeep, roll a d6. On a 1–3, Aidan, the Shirtless Closer is tapped and deals 1 damage to himself as he “just had a bite, it should be fine.” Shirtless Intimidation — Aidan cannot be blocked by creatures with a power less than 3. They are simply too uncomfortable to make eye contact. The Big Close — {T}: Target opponent discards a card as Aidan explains, at length, why your product is actually an investment. Drop the Bass — Whenever Aidan attacks, all creatures must attack next turn. They didn’t want to go out but he already bought the tickets.