Colossus of Schlongia

Trample, Indestructible, First Strike
Colossus of Schlongia's Power and
Toughness (hardness) is equal to your devotion to
black.
If Colossus of Schlongia's hardness is
greater than 6 it gains Vigilance since it
is so rock hard that it physically cannot tap.
If its' hardness is greater than 10 it gains
Doublestrike & makes your opponent beg for it