Crush into Little Tiny Bits

Feed, intoxicate target creature, then exile target creature.
(Put a -1/-1 counter on target creature,
then put a +1/+1 counter on another target creature. Target creature gets +X/+Y, where X
is half its power and Y is half its toughness, rounded down, and gains either Trample,
Double Strike, or Lifelink, chosen at random,
until end of turn. Exert it. )