gumfreddy

+2: gumfreddy spews a barrage of anime emoticons at a single opposing Planeswalker. They are incapacitated for a single turn.
0: gumfreddy casts a defensive wall of dank memes and is immune to sorcerys for two turns.
-8: You get an emblem with "gumfreddy vexes any player that calls him 'gummy'. All of the opponent's cards cost an additional two mana."