Joe Rogan, Ethereal Host

-2: Until your next turn, All damage that would be dealt to Joe is dealt to target creature instead. "There's something wrong with this guy man"
+1: Gain control of target creature until your next turn, that creature gains defender. "Hey!, welcome to the show man"
-6: Create a 5/5 bear with wither for each commander your opponents control. They fight. "Jamie pull up that clip of my opponents fighting a bear