Lois Griffin Statue

At the beginning of your upkeep, if it's between
9:30 pm and 4 am EST, you may flip this card
onto the battlefield from a height of at least
one foot. If it turns over completely at least once
during the flip, destroy all permanents it touches.
Then destroy Lois Griffin Statue.
{t}: Target creature gets -1/-0 until end of turn.
See, we're all terrible people inside.