Phantom, on the Side

+2: Phantom, on the Side wags his tail, causing target creature to lose all abilities and have base power and toughness 0/1 until end of turn.
0: Phantom, on the Side went to puppy school. Draw a card, if that card is a land, repeat this process.
-7: You get an emblem with "Whenever a player completes a pipi pupu rug, that player wins the game."