Retheble, the Witty Clever

First Strike
Whenever Retheble, the Witty Clever attacks, if it's equipped, it deals 2 damage to target creature. Then if a creature died this turn, Retheble gets +2/+0 and deals 1 damage to each creature, player, and planeswalker.
"The hurling of rocks I can withstand. The jokes he makes while doing it makes me wish to flay him."
-Inseis, the Fatal Lash