Shane, Master of Snark

+1: Shirts In Bags: Create an artifact token named A Moment of Your Time with "At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 token on this artifact".
-2: Delegation: Create a 1/1 Human Employee Creature, you may move any number of +1/+1 counters from A Moment of Your Time to a creature you control.
-7: Ownership: Control target creature for each 1/1 Human Employee Creature you control.