Sloth

Trample, suspend 2—{1}{b}{g}
Sloth can't attack or block unless it's the only creature you control.

Whenever a player casts a creature spell, counter
that spell. If the spell is countered this way, exile
it with one time counter on it instead of putting
it into its owner's graveyard. If it doesn't have
suspend, it gains suspend.

"I'd laugh at you, but it's too much effort."