t-rex of randomness

when t-rex of randomness enters the graveyard, deal y damage to target artifact, where y is the number of loyalty counters on each creature you control.
each enchantment you control with deathtuch loses deathtouch and gains swampwalk.
if a creature would be sent to a graveyard, destroy it instead.
Disclaimer: This was created for a contest about crappy card design.