The Thiefmaker of Shades Hill

Creatures you control with power 1 or less are unblockable and have "Whenever this creature attacks, draw a card, then discard a card."
"I'm not training you for a calm and orderly world
where you can pick and choose when you need to be
clever. Remember, when you're up to your heads in
dark water, you're not the helpless fish, you're the
gods-damned sharks."