The Way of The Keef Man

You play with all cards facing the opponent with
the whitest smile. (Upside-down for you,
right-side up for them).
Whenever a nonland card you control becomes
tapped, you may tap it in the opposite direction
of another target tapped nonland permanent you
control. If you do, you gain 1 life.
"I'd tap that." - The Keef Man